BRICOLEUR

I don't know what time it is, but its late and all I hear is the sound of drizzling rain outside my window and wind hitting against the glass.  I turn over my pillow to the cold side but there isn't one.  I've been staring at raindrops on the window mentally betting on which ones gonna win.  Cobwebs on the corners of my ceiling and books- in massive piles- all over my desk and floor.  My eyes hurt when I turn on my phone and I cant see anything for a few seconds. Still squinting I click on your contact and your last seen is a few minutes ago. I wonder what you were doing up this late because I still remember how tired you'd get by 11 pm. I wonder who you were talking to. I cant help but wish it was me.  I'm about to say hello, but I cant get myself to because I don't know what i could say to make it all better or how I could make you understand why it all happened the way it did. I scroll up longing to read your last words. But. There aren't an

I loved the way you loved me. Because something in you reflected me. Your eyes made me realize that I'm more than just a black cloud. A black cloud- with a streak of silver. You highlighted me. And every time your lips found mine,   I melted. Melted into silver and gold- with a streak of black. But as my cloud changed colors, Yours darkened. Your eyes weren't the same blue anymore. I wondered why. But before I figured you out, You were nothing but a black cloud- with a streak of silver. You found me. But you lost yourself. ~esha xo