BRICOLEUR

 It all began like any other story. We hated each other cold. But it melted away when the first few sparks of friendship changed everything. The sparks grew into a strong blue flame. Somehow it never managed to turn red. It was almost like a masquerade. We pretended to be and not to be. Surprisingly it only brought us closer. We used to build ourselves this perfect world and break it all apart ever so often that it became a routine. We turned friendship cynical.  We did the stupidest things and I have so much to remember. Honestly, I dont think I was anything or anyone before these people. They've changed me in an irreversible way and I dont really know if I'm supposed to be grateful or lost to myself. I loved how we could talk about nothing and everything at the same time. They gave me a sense of belonging and I felt complete. Together we were the sharp autumn breeze on searing afternoons. Summer soon drifted and turned into autumn itself and like everyone else we fai

Messed up,  the definition of every teenager's life. and then we all do the stupid mistake of thinking we're the only ones. We point at one another and judge how much easier the other has it. It's staying up late and thinking about people who don't care and probably wont ever care. It's taking up a handful of problems when you know you're never going to be able to hold them all together. It's staring into infinity and realising everything's changed and that its never going to be the same ever again. It's being so sad that you cant even cry. It's breaking down at the most unexpected moments. It's screaming at the wrong people about the wrong things. It's accusing and misunderstanding. It's holding back and bottling up your thoughts because you don't want to be a burden. It's convincing yourself that you don't deserve to be happy. If you say you haven't gone through that you'd be lying. That would be smoke without