EVERY TEENAGER EVER

Messed up, the definition of every teenager's life. and then we all do the stupid mistake of thinking we're the only ones. We point at one another and judge how much easier the other has it. It's staying up late and thinking about people who don't care and probably wont ever care. It's taking up a handful of problems when you know you're never going to be able to hold them all together. It's staring into infinity and realising everything's changed and that its never going to be the same ever again. It's being so sad that you cant even cry. It's breaking down at the most unexpected moments. It's screaming at the wrong people about the wrong things. It's accusing and misunderstanding. It's holding back and bottling up your thoughts because you don't want to be a burden. It's convincing yourself that you don't deserve to be happy. If you say you haven't gone through that you'd be lying. That would be smoke without fire. You could have the most amazing people around you and they'd still never know the real you. That mask we all put on only comes off in isolation. The you who tries too hard. The you who is secretly adventurous and hates wearing those preppy clothes. The you who aspires to be someone who would finally matter and make a difference. The you that wants to be as good as the person next to you. The you who waits and is always waiting for the untold- aren't we all? Guys- The magic is in the mess. Just own it. Easier said than done, we will understand ourselves once we've destroyed ourselves and, only in the process of fixing ourselves, will we know who we really are. But hey. It's messed up because you've tried and you cared. That's got to mean something (most of you are probably like how cliché is this going to get..just wait). At the end of the day, its only you. You came here alone and you are destined to leave alone- well unless you and your best friend have secretly planned to murder each other so you don't have to live a day without one another...*ahem*

Point is people will remain as hypocritical and bitchy as they have always been. No one cares unless you're either pretty or dying. Bitter truth. And since most of us aren't an Augustus Waters with a Hazel Grace by our bedside, we're stuck like this. Stuck in a messed up world with messed up lives and definitely messed up brains that cant get those annoying songs out of them- especially when we're doing math (cause everything has been so perfectly timed. *rolls eyes*)

 You know those times when you write a cute note or buy flowers for that special someone that lightens up your day? Yeah. Try being that nice to yourself and maybe things will change. We are our worst enemies. It's not messed up till you say it is. But then again, it's destined to always be.

Its been a long time guys. I'm blaming exams and writers block. How convenient? No but seriously this used to be my escape from reality and I really have missed it. Look forward to new stuff atleast once a week cause summer's here- yay? no. not yay. I'm beyond bored. But I'll tell you more about that some other time

~Nidhi xo