How do you lose yourself? You're a tenth grader and you decide it's high time and you better start being serious. You do all your work, keep yourself occupied all the time so that you barely have time to even socialise, but, you stop doing the little things you enjoyed doing. You don't sing in the shower anymore and you don't wander off in your own world of peculiar imagination and you soon realise that you've lost your creativity.
Before, it was so easy to get over tough times. Of course, back then, you had support from just about everyone you knew. I mean, you could literally just brush off your problems and begin again. But now, all your problems just seem to add up. You're less bubbly now and you barely know what to say in conversations. The distance between you and the people that mean the world to you just gets bigger and bigger. You upset people without having the slightest bit of knowledge on what you did wrong. YOU'RE MISUNDERSTOOD. You worked so hard just to get your life back on track, but you gave everything away in the process. You feel engulfed in this endless struggle. It feels almost as if your past stole parts of you.
People ask you if you're okay; You reply saying that you're just really tired but in reality, you don't know what you are anymore or what even is the point of your existence.
You look at yourself in the mirror. You look exactly like yourself except maybe a little exhausted. But, even so, you don't quite recognise the person that you see. Your eyes are subdued and you look completely drained. You smile at yourself but you don't see happiness in you. There. You've lost yourself.
~Shati xo
Tenth grade is harder than what movies and books describe it as. There's no cute relationships. There aren't fun conversations in between classes anymore either. It's almost as if all of us have turned into these motor robots who have a certain set of things to do each day. When you're not doing homework you study. When you're not studying you do left over assignments. And when you're not doing that. Your preparing for upcoming tests and exams and what not. People say its easy as long as you have a time-table and you complete your work on time. But that's the problem isn't it. Time. There just isn't enough of it. Hardly any left over to do the things you love at least. Even weekends have turned into endless hours of staring into a textbook. I think the bathroom is the only place I can actually think straight. Hope that doesn't get taken away anytime soon.
Before, it was so easy to get over tough times. Of course, back then, you had support from just about everyone you knew. I mean, you could literally just brush off your problems and begin again. But now, all your problems just seem to add up. You're less bubbly now and you barely know what to say in conversations. The distance between you and the people that mean the world to you just gets bigger and bigger. You upset people without having the slightest bit of knowledge on what you did wrong. YOU'RE MISUNDERSTOOD. You worked so hard just to get your life back on track, but you gave everything away in the process. You feel engulfed in this endless struggle. It feels almost as if your past stole parts of you.
People ask you if you're okay; You reply saying that you're just really tired but in reality, you don't know what you are anymore or what even is the point of your existence.
You look at yourself in the mirror. You look exactly like yourself except maybe a little exhausted. But, even so, you don't quite recognise the person that you see. Your eyes are subdued and you look completely drained. You smile at yourself but you don't see happiness in you. There. You've lost yourself.
~Shati xo
Tenth grade is harder than what movies and books describe it as. There's no cute relationships. There aren't fun conversations in between classes anymore either. It's almost as if all of us have turned into these motor robots who have a certain set of things to do each day. When you're not doing homework you study. When you're not studying you do left over assignments. And when you're not doing that. Your preparing for upcoming tests and exams and what not. People say its easy as long as you have a time-table and you complete your work on time. But that's the problem isn't it. Time. There just isn't enough of it. Hardly any left over to do the things you love at least. Even weekends have turned into endless hours of staring into a textbook. I think the bathroom is the only place I can actually think straight. Hope that doesn't get taken away anytime soon.
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